Feel It and You Will Find It

Want to hear a story?
I was recently talking to an amazing woman, who felt totally exhausted trying to keep up everything she thought she had to do to lose weight, she was really beating herself up about failing at her effort to try to get the body she dreamed of AND she wasn't enjoying any of it. She told me that this diet & exercise plan was ruining her life!
I asked her if she was 100% sure she had to do all these things to reach her goal?

She was sure she did, in fact she told me that if she stopped any of these things she would probably gain weight. (UGH!!!) She knew everything that experts had to say about weight loss, because she was trying to lose weight most of her adult life!
She totally believed in a plan that had never produced ANY results for her...WHAT THE....??!!!
So I want to ask you something...
Do you believe the following sayings are true?
the early bird gets the worm
money doesn't grow on trees
it takes one to know one...
Are you totally sure that they are the TRUTH?
Don't you think sometimes that late birds get worms? Is there really a shortage of worms? Birds seem to be doing okay...
Do you have to be a rude person to recognize a rude person? Isn't it subjective anyway?
We sometimes believe in things just because we've heard them for so long.
There is another "formula" we are so used to believing in that we don't even know its really there: its the three step goal formula:
1. decide what fancy goal you want
2. work hard
3. don't stop until you get it
It's basically the American Dream, something near and dear to my heart. Now I'm not entirely saying this will never work, but if you're using it, are you checking those goals off left and right?
Almost all self-help and goal programs (including weight loss) are variations on this one theme, first known to be written about in Napoleon Hill's Think & Grow Rich in 1937.
As I've shared before, 97% of all self-help programs fail, including diet plans. They don't just fail, in fact, they usually fail in a spectacular way, they usually leave the subject worse off than before they started, even if their goal was momentarily achieved.
What's a girl to do? I know how absolutely soul crushing this frustration is.
I've shared with you before about my personal struggles and how they lead me to create Newport Skinny tea. And even though I believe in the power of my products with my whole being, I know that in order to make BIG changes, we've got to see things in a NEW way. We've got to see OURSELVES in a new, powerful, amazing way. Then, we've got to take action steps to get there.
Mindset change is critical to finding success in weight loss.
Once I figured that key part out, that I was trying to achieve changes in my own life using the formula that wasn't working, I decided to flip the 3 step formula on its head, instead of working from the outside in, I thought,  let's try working from the inside out.
I know one thing that we have in common, its that you have a secret wish inside of you. How can I be so sure of this? Because you are working hard, you want change and that means you haven't given up on yourself, yet. I am the same way, I just hadn't yet realized how big of an underdog we actually were using that old school way of thinking.
Almost all people believe that by achieving goals in their lives, such as making $1 million dollars, getting a smoking body or a brand new house all of their problems are going to be solved. They believe that external solutions are going to change their internal states of being.
So let's find out exactly what you are dreaming of....
If a genie granted you one wish (no wishing for more wishes either!) WHAT would it be?
That one thing you named holds a key to what you're really seeking, that BIG external goal represents the ACTUAL internal state that you think will make your life better.
If your answer was, to have a banging body... ask yourself, what does this represent for you? Does it mean that you will be desired by others, that you will feel loved, worthy of being taken care of and secure in a relationship? Does it mean you will never feel lonely or unwanted?
What you are really searching for is the feeling of security and unconditional love, something you can never find from a place of insecurity. The #1 reported desire for women is security.  And it is something that someone else can never really give to you. In order to feel pride, security and self assurance, you first have to FEEL it on the inside, you have to be secure.
Let's say you decide to make a traditional plan to "get in shape" and you start going to the gym everyday and stop eating anything "bad." You are going to willpower this goal into your life. All the sudden, you are tired, you are sore, and you are feeling a whole bunch of feelings you normally ate your way out of feeling... two weeks go by, things are getting worse, not better, your family is upset you are taking time to work on you, you aren't cooking the great foods you normally do and there's a bunch of chaos around you...
NOT what you were hoping for. Suddenly you have a huge fight with your significant other... then what? What happens when you are feeling low? Even more insecure about things, do you willpower through it? No, not usually. Most people cave and get lost in a pizza and beer haze... then beat themselves up about how weak their willpower is... sigh. Most people think they fail the plan, but the truth is, the plan fails them in 97% of the cases.
How do you change this? How do you get to that opposite state from where you are now?
Before you start making external changes, first start by deciding not to rely on "willpower" anymore, will power doesn't work, especially in the long run.
Then, figure out what you are really wanting to feel through all this external efforting, figure out the STATE that you long to FEEL.
WHEN YOU FEEL IT, YOU WILL FIND IT.
Change your feelings and watch the magic happen. Keep an eye out for part 2, when I will discuss the next step in this cutting edge formula.
Here's a question for you to think about,
How GOOD can you let your life be?
Jennifer
XOXO